What is a handfasting ceremony?

A ritual in which the couple's hands are bound together with cord, ribbon or cloth while promises are spoken. It comes from Celtic and Northern European practice, predates the modern wedding by centuries, and is where the phrase tying the knot comes from. Today it is usually one moment inside a larger ceremony.

Is a handfasting legally binding in Australia?

Not by itself. A marriage in Australia is legal because an authorised celebrant says the required words and the paperwork is lodged — the cords have no legal weight at all. A handfasting sits inside a legal wedding ceremony, or inside a commitment ceremony where no legal effect is intended.

What cords do we need for a handfasting?

Whatever means something to you. Traditionally several cords in colours chosen for what they represent, but a single ribbon works, and so does a piece of fabric with a family history. Most couples bring their own; cords can be provided if you would rather not think about it.

Usually the celebrant, sometimes parents or children, occasionally each of the couple binding the other. Having family do it turns a thirty-second ritual into the part of the ceremony people remember, and it is worth deciding at the rehearsal rather than on the day.

Handfasting: the ritual and the cord

Handfasting is the ritual where a couple's hands are bound with cord or ribbon while they make their promises — the origin of the phrase tying the knot. It has no legal effect on its own and sits inside a wedding, a vow renewal or a commitment ceremony. Including it costs nothing extra.

Where the ritual sits in a ceremony

In a wedding a handfasting almost always goes after the vows and before the rings: the promises are made, the hands are bound while they are still joined, and the rings follow as the practical version of the same idea. It takes thirty to sixty seconds. In a vow renewal or a commitment ceremony it can sit anywhere, because there is no legal structure to work around.

Somebody has to do the binding, and who it is changes the moment. A celebrant is the neutral option. Parents, children or a sibling turns half a minute into the part of the ceremony people talk about afterwards. Decide it at the rehearsal, along with who holds the cords until they are needed and where they go once the hands come apart.

Cords, and the colours they are given

There is no authoritative list, and anybody who tells you there is has picked one. These are the meanings most commonly given in modern handfasting practice, drawn from Celtic and Northern European tradition and interpreted freely ever since: red for passion and strength, orange for encouragement, yellow for joy and confidence, green for growth and prosperity, blue for fidelity and calm, purple for wisdom and devotion, white for peace and a clean start, silver for creativity, gold for prosperity and long life, and black for constancy.

Most couples use one to three cords and choose them for something other than the list — the colour of a grandmother's dress, a strip cut from a family blanket, a ribbon kept from a christening. That is nearer the tradition than a colour chart is. Cords can be provided if you would rather not think about it, and including the ritual costs nothing extra.

Questions people ask

What is a handfasting ceremony?: A ritual in which the couple's hands are bound together with cord, ribbon or cloth while promises are spoken. It comes from Celtic and Northern European practice, predates the modern wedding by centuries, and is where the phrase tying the knot comes from. Today it is usually one moment inside a larger ceremony.
Is a handfasting legally binding in Australia?: Not by itself. A marriage in Australia is legal because an authorised celebrant says the required words and the paperwork is lodged — the cords have no legal weight at all. A handfasting sits inside a legal wedding ceremony, or inside a commitment ceremony where no legal effect is intended.
What cords do we need for a handfasting?: Whatever means something to you. Traditionally several cords in colours chosen for what they represent, but a single ribbon works, and so does a piece of fabric with a family history. Most couples bring their own; cords can be provided if you would rather not think about it.
Who ties the knot?: Usually the celebrant, sometimes parents or children, occasionally each of the couple binding the other. Having family do it turns a thirty-second ritual into the part of the ceremony people remember, and it is worth deciding at the rehearsal rather than on the day.

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